Friday, June 1, 2012

Online flirting while you already have a partner

Real Life Results of Virtual Behavior

So , rakan rakan  twitter will understand this . What's the harm in flirting online? It's practiced in most especially in twitter. After all, flirting is a courtship device. It's how we attract a mate; how we find that special someone. There are a lot of people who have found each other through chat rooms or online dating services. Lagi lagi masa #twtup . masing masing cari jodoh !

Flirtation is fun. We laugh and smile, we're more outgoing, we feel better physically and mentally because it  make us happy and that's good for us. Flirting not only helps us attract a mate, but it helps us retain a mate as well. It keeps a relationship fresh and interesting.

Howerver , what about those who are in a relationship and are flirting with someone else while their mate is sleeping or otherwise occupied? What's the harm . . . after all, it's not like you have any intention of meeting. It's fun. It's harmless . . . or is it?

The Shift

Although many people flirt while their GF/BF  is sleeping or otherwise occupied, there are real life consequences for the virtual flirt.
If you're flirting and you're hiding it from your mate, there is a reason you're hiding it. It feels wrong; it violates the standards you hold for yourself. It's a 'shift'; an emotional reaction, and when you feel that shift it's because something going on between your conscious and unconscious mind. Something about hiding it feels wrong, and it should. It's not just "bad form"; it's a violation of trust; it's dishonest, and it harms not only you but the others involved. You might want to examine your behavior and why you're even in the relationship.

The Consequences

 Those choices and actions color our perceptions; they change the way we perceive ourselves and they affect each subsequent choice we make.

Each time violate a standard we've held for ourselves, we feel that 'shift'. We've lowered our standard of what is acceptable for us. When we do that, we've lost a portion of our self worth, and once we've devalued not only our mate, but we've devalued ourselves.

Each time we do this, it becomes easier to violate the new lower standard we set. We've violated the trust of not only our mate, but we've violated the trust we had in ourselves, and possible the trust of the person you were flirting with.

For example korang pernah kan flirt , and then akan bercakap sendiri :  "I can't believe I did that," you know what I'm talking about.

Where does it lead? It leads to a downward spiral in which we begin justifying our unacceptable actions. It's easier to place blame on someone else than it is to look at ourselves. If we can blame 'it' on someone else, we don't have to examine and fix what is wrong with us.
When we begin lying to ourselves and believing our own lies we've crossed into an area full of shit.


p/s : Im sorry . 

1 comment:

  1. online flirting ni more on twitter kn? thats y i dun trust men who active twitter-ing :(